Reflection blog-End of Life

My reflection blog post this week is on the Chapter 16 reading. This chapter brought up a lot of emotions for me. It made feel sad for the loved ones I have lost and also contemplative about the "end-of-life" issues that we all have to eventually face. I think it is important that everyone have a living will or a healthcare directive in place, not just at old age. They can be revised and updated as much as needed for the changes in life. It is also important to have a Healthcare Power of Attorney to help make decisions for those who are not mentally compentent or how are unconscious. I remember the Terri Schiavo case. I think this is very difficult because on one hand, she was married and her husband was to be her primary caretaker. He felt that she wouldn't have wanted to live in a persistant vegatative state the rest of her life having someone else take care of her every need. Her parents, on the other hand, thought she may recover some of the brain damage she suffered when she was unconscious. I can see where a healthcare directive is so important in this case because of the vast difference between the beliefs of those close to her. I also think it is rather in humane to take away someone's feeding tube as a means of letting them die. I think it causes pain and suffering because a person can live for a while without food. I don't believe in euthanasia either. I think when it is someone's time to go, then God will make that call. I could not work for a doctor who performed this type of "death with dignity". I have had a lot of experience working with hospice in my time in healthcare and I really feel like they do such a great job. They are trying to give the terminally ill patient comfort and way to die in peace. The nurses and doctors who work for hospice have my utmost respect. I think most of us have experienced a death of a loved one in our lives and this chapter definitely brought up the memories of those deaths for me.

Week 9 Reflection

I chose to do my reflection blog entry this week on the article, "As Good As It Gets". I really enjoyed this article because it focused more on the people who have lived through the type of retirement system in the Netherlands instead of the numbers or statistics. There were numbers and statistics as well, but they were easy to follow and seemed very relatable. I think it is very significant to the times we are living in right now in the US with the Affordable Healthcare Act and Healthcare Reform. There are some similarities, but a vast amount of differences as well. I, for one, don't think that a forced retirement age of 65 is so bad if you know, for sure, that you were getting the pension promised to you from the government and if they don't tell you how you can spend your retirement. They also seem to have a better since of community than we do in the US. The Dutch believe in the family unit and taking care of each other. They are very traditional and tend to be conservative, hard working and try to enjoy life to the fullest. The way their government or state is set-up makes it easier for them to enjoy life. The Netherlands is very small compared to the US. I think it is reasonable to start making the laws and rules at the state level instead of the federal level because each state is so different in it's culture and environment. I don't know if we will know for quite some time if the current changes are going to make or break the country. I, myself, am not looking forward to the higher taxes and less income.

Week 8 Reflection

I decided to do my reflection this week on the chapter reading, particularly chapter 13. This is the most relavent in my life right now that I can highly relate to. I found myself, at the age of 32, having to make a life altering decision. My Mom became very ill, the doctor called it terminally ill, and the relationship between my parents was also deteriorating. My parents and I decided that I would move in with my mom and my dad would move in where I was (I was living with two of my brothers helping to take care of my older brothers kids) and he would take over my role there. We all thought it would be temporary until either my mom got better or worse. That was back in October 2012. That month was really hard because I was working full-time, but was also my mom's caregiver. There was no question that I was going to do whatever it took to make it so my mom could get better. I sacrificed (I say that lightly) my social life to an extent and also my freedom. I was stressed to the max. I found it interesting in the reading that, in general, most caregivers of sick or aging parents are the women regardless of whether or not they are employed, mothers themselves and/or wives. Although I am not a mother or wife, I still felt the emotional and physical stress of a sick parent. With my parents not being together and fighting as much, my mother was able to recuperate, along with medical intervention. She is doing much better, stronger, able to care for herself now. As for me, I decided that I was going to go back to school. I would drop everything again if it came down to it because I believe that we should honor our mothers and fathers. She always took care of me (and still does) so I feel it is my duty to care for her.

Reflection post

I decided to do my reflection blog on the article, "Should You Stay Together for the Kids?" The author suggests that divorce does harm children contrary to the belief that a good divorce is better than a bad marriage. I agree that, not only is divorce hard on the adults because usually there is no such thing as a good divorce, it is far worse on the children because they don't know what to expect and they have no control over the situation. I have experienced a few of my close friends and family members who have gone through divorces in the last few years. As soon as the one of the parents move out, the kids start having trouble in school or start acting out in some way. I, at age 33, am now a child of divorce and I can tell you it still isn't easy to be caught in the middle when you are an adult, but at least I have the option to leave or not answer my phone if possible. I am also in a relationship with someone who has been divorced and has children. I think that saving a marriage should be a consideration, especially if there are children involved. I also think that children need to have good examples of healthy relationships so if there is constant fighting, it is going to scar them just as much as if their parents are divorced. These days, it is more common to meet friends whose parents are divorced more than married, so kids whose parents are married might feel left out. I know there are plenty of single parents out there that have been successful in taking care of their children or making a divorce situation work for their children without much interruption. My brother gained custody of his children after his divorce. He, not only has had to be both Mom and Dad, but also works 12 hrs a day and doesn't get any financial support from his ex-wife. He has done the best he can and luckily, he has a very supportive family who have helped him along the way. The kids are adjusting, but I feel like they will be scarred for a while and may have issues with their future relationships.

Week 6 Reflection-Fitting In

I chose to do my reflection blog on the Chapter 9 reading specifically regarding Identity and Self-Esteem. I relate my experience with my identity and self-esteem during my adolescence directly with the fact that my parents moved us 2500 miles away from where we had "grown-up". I was only 10 years old when we moved from Texas to Washington. It was in the middle of the school year, also. I was born in Texas and grew-up in a small town, but around many family and friends. I was very outgoing and was involved in gymnastics...I wanted to be Mary Lou Retton. I was popular in school and always received good grades. I was invited to all of the birthday parties and our family attended church on a regular basis. We also had a lot of family functions that we attended. I identified myself with my home state and my family at that time. When we moved half-way through my 4th grade school year, not only was I devistated and saddened to leave my family and friends, it also made me very nervous and anxious to start at a new school. I personally think that I lost most of my self-esteem when we moved because I became a "little fish in a big pond" and didn't know anyone. I got through it, of course, but it was tough. When we moved, my parents also worked nights, so I was left under the supervision of my older brothers. I feel I had to grow-up a little quicker than I needed too, but I also think this made me more independent. I wouldn't say I had a bad childhood. I think if it were different, had we stayed in Texas, I might've been more content or I might've felt like there was nothing there for me either. I am in my early 30's now. It took me quite a while to get over the hit to my self-esteem and identity.

Reflection-Parenting Styles

I chose to do my reflection on the Chapter 7 reading in regards to the parenting styles. I really enjoyed reading this chapter. It is important to know how different cultures and families choose to parent. I could've guessed that the Chinese cultures were more about having control of your emotions because it always is that way in the movies. Also, the Latin cultures are definitely more about the family as a whole. I have known quite a few Latin families and often times, they live together even after the children get married so they can help support each other.

As for me, I grew up with parents that were between Permissive and Univolved. This was mostly because we had a large family and both of my parents had to work 2 jobs just to make ends meet. We spent a lot of time, as kids, watching each other. I wouldn't say that my parents were uninvolved emotionally. They told us they loved us very much and showed us by their working so hard everyday. When I mean Uninvolved, I mean they didn't come to concerts or participate in school activities much as we got older. The permissive part was mostly because they weren't around and we all knew how to manipulate them into letting us do what we wanted because they didn't ask too many questions. I don't feel like any of us had little self-control. We all have good jobs and have become vital parts of society.

I chose to do my reflection on the reading from Chapter 6 in the textbook. It was regarding cognitive and physical development in middle childhood. I found this chapter interesting although much of it is theoretical. Physical development is subjective and easy to measure. You can see a child is developing or not developing physically and we can even do genetic testing before the child is born to determine the level of physical development they will attain. The cognitive development is objective which means that you can take all of the genetic, enviroment, sociocultural and biological factors and determine how a child might develop cognitively, but it is not something that can be matter of factly measured. There are studies here and there about if a child grows up in a home with an abusive father, there is a great likelihood they will grow up and become the abuser. If you just look at the numbers, yeah, they tend to be high, but there is no way to quantify ALL of the abused children and follow them to adulthood, so you always have to question the statistics. I also didn't see much on autism in this chapter (unless I totally missed it). Autism seems to be much more prevelant now than it did a couple of decades ago even, but it could be because there are better ways to detect it or diagnosis it now and the spectrum has become broader. I have a friend who has a child who is on the mild end of autism, but he is very much affected. He gets physically ill if there is any changes in his daily routine including going to school, if she cooks something different for him or if she uses different laundry detergent. He is highly sensitive and there isn't enough known about his mental illness to really treat. He definitely will not be able to thrive on his own in society without her support or the support of a group home of some sort and she has been a single parent to him for his entire life. She also isn't able to provide him with the most effective therapies because of the limitations of his insurance (Molina). I do think there are mental illnesses that one can overcome and then there are the ones that one cannot overcome without medication, counseling and lifelong struggle. All in all, I feel proud of my friend for being such a supportive, sometimes enabling, parent given that she hasn't had much help.